Act Your Age!

Do you ever feel like you just don't belong? In fact, you feel so out of place, you worry that people think you are weird, or a freak, or worse.... a pervert.

Sean and I have found ourselves in this very realm lately. Let's go through the list:

1. Snore and Roar - We were the only ones there without children and joked that people probably thought we were weird. This was only the beginning.

2. On our one rainy day at the beach we went to see a movie. We wanted something fun and light hearted and playing at the nearby theater, so we chose Surf's Up. Again, we were old adults without children. We expected this.

3. The Pirate Ship - While in Ocean City, we stayed in Montego Bay. We rented a lovely 3 Bedroom house with a nice view of the bay. Several times a day we would hear pirate activity out on the water as we watched people spraying down smaller boats from the pirate ship with water cannons. From the dock, it looked like a party cruise, and something we wanted to do. On the last day of our vacation, Sean and I ponied up $36 for the both of us and went to board the Pirate Ship. We declined the $6 bandanna but as I began to grab a free eye patch, I noticed a crew member painting tattoos. Then I noticed that most everyone there had a hand painted moustache and skulls pained on their arms and were wearing eye patches. And everyone was under 3 feet tall. I quickly put the eye patch back in the bowl because I was afraid everyone would mistake me for the Shrek sized 7 year old and with the limited vision, I might trip on a little person. On this cruise, we were looking for sunken treasure and we had to take down the other pirates using the big water cannons. No where on the advertisement was it implied that you might be bored if you don't bring a pre-schooler.

The entire cruise was geared towards kids. The kids got to sign their name to the flag that was hoisted on the sail. At one point I was standing in the sun which happened to put me right beside a water cannon. When it was time to spray two pirates in a little motor boat, I thought SCORE! I've got my own cannon. The captain walked right past me and said, "we have a cannon over here." So this little boy took my cannon and when I asked if we could share, the mother glared at me. ARRRR, I thought in my pirate voice. So I went back to the bow and sat with Sean.
When we brought the treasure on board, it was full of jelly bracelets, gaudy rings, spiders and more. Fun junk. The kids took all of it. I finally reached over and grabbed one bright pink jelly bracelet for a souvenir, but I had to make my arm really skinny and slide it between two greedy boys who were bent over the treasure box. I guess we should have considered ourselves lucky that we got to share Pete's grog that was fished out of the bay for us. It tasted a lot like root beer, and we all got to share it.

4. Upon returning from Ocean City, Sean and I decided to take a bike ride this past Sunday. We finished our ride and decided to eat our picnic lunch on a set of bleachers in the shade. While eating, teenage boys starting arriving. We were sitting beside a baseball diamond. We learn that the kids are scrimmaging today and we enjoy watching. Then it happened. We saw it coming but froze in our tracks. From the dugout, emerges an excited Frank. (I mean a man, not a hotdog.) "Hi, I'm Frank. I don't think we have met. I'm Todd's father. Which one is yours?" He shakes Sean's hand as he introduces himself and Sean tells Frank his name. I shake his hand and introduce myself just as we finally get out that, "We are just passing through and eating our lunch." Frank is clearly embarrassed about his generous introduction and having to shake our dirty hands, but not as embarrassed as we were.

We realized that one day our kids are going to want to do these fun adventures and we'll have to tell them... "We've already done that. You'll have to find someone else to go with. It was lame, go with one of your little friends."

We also know we better watch our reputation and stop hanging out with munchkins so much.