Act Your Age!

Do you ever feel like you just don't belong? In fact, you feel so out of place, you worry that people think you are weird, or a freak, or worse.... a pervert.

Sean and I have found ourselves in this very realm lately. Let's go through the list:

1. Snore and Roar - We were the only ones there without children and joked that people probably thought we were weird. This was only the beginning.

2. On our one rainy day at the beach we went to see a movie. We wanted something fun and light hearted and playing at the nearby theater, so we chose Surf's Up. Again, we were old adults without children. We expected this.

3. The Pirate Ship - While in Ocean City, we stayed in Montego Bay. We rented a lovely 3 Bedroom house with a nice view of the bay. Several times a day we would hear pirate activity out on the water as we watched people spraying down smaller boats from the pirate ship with water cannons. From the dock, it looked like a party cruise, and something we wanted to do. On the last day of our vacation, Sean and I ponied up $36 for the both of us and went to board the Pirate Ship. We declined the $6 bandanna but as I began to grab a free eye patch, I noticed a crew member painting tattoos. Then I noticed that most everyone there had a hand painted moustache and skulls pained on their arms and were wearing eye patches. And everyone was under 3 feet tall. I quickly put the eye patch back in the bowl because I was afraid everyone would mistake me for the Shrek sized 7 year old and with the limited vision, I might trip on a little person. On this cruise, we were looking for sunken treasure and we had to take down the other pirates using the big water cannons. No where on the advertisement was it implied that you might be bored if you don't bring a pre-schooler.

The entire cruise was geared towards kids. The kids got to sign their name to the flag that was hoisted on the sail. At one point I was standing in the sun which happened to put me right beside a water cannon. When it was time to spray two pirates in a little motor boat, I thought SCORE! I've got my own cannon. The captain walked right past me and said, "we have a cannon over here." So this little boy took my cannon and when I asked if we could share, the mother glared at me. ARRRR, I thought in my pirate voice. So I went back to the bow and sat with Sean.
When we brought the treasure on board, it was full of jelly bracelets, gaudy rings, spiders and more. Fun junk. The kids took all of it. I finally reached over and grabbed one bright pink jelly bracelet for a souvenir, but I had to make my arm really skinny and slide it between two greedy boys who were bent over the treasure box. I guess we should have considered ourselves lucky that we got to share Pete's grog that was fished out of the bay for us. It tasted a lot like root beer, and we all got to share it.

4. Upon returning from Ocean City, Sean and I decided to take a bike ride this past Sunday. We finished our ride and decided to eat our picnic lunch on a set of bleachers in the shade. While eating, teenage boys starting arriving. We were sitting beside a baseball diamond. We learn that the kids are scrimmaging today and we enjoy watching. Then it happened. We saw it coming but froze in our tracks. From the dugout, emerges an excited Frank. (I mean a man, not a hotdog.) "Hi, I'm Frank. I don't think we have met. I'm Todd's father. Which one is yours?" He shakes Sean's hand as he introduces himself and Sean tells Frank his name. I shake his hand and introduce myself just as we finally get out that, "We are just passing through and eating our lunch." Frank is clearly embarrassed about his generous introduction and having to shake our dirty hands, but not as embarrassed as we were.

We realized that one day our kids are going to want to do these fun adventures and we'll have to tell them... "We've already done that. You'll have to find someone else to go with. It was lame, go with one of your little friends."

We also know we better watch our reputation and stop hanging out with munchkins so much.

Ocean City

Last week Sean and I joined my family for a week in Ocean City. It had been a long time since all of us had vacationed together. It will probably be a long time before any of us try it again.

The week started with a boat race. The Not Guilty team had spent the prior week getting repairs done, so it was no surprise that 60 minutes before the race began they found that the trim tab was no longer working. After a few attempts to bang this and that, it would not work even though just a few minutes before, it did. A lot of good ideas were discussed, but with such little time, Team Not Guilty had to figure out a plan. The discussion goes something like this every time:

Ray: Always something, I don't think we should race.

Rob: We're racing, it won't matter.

Ray: I don't think we should race.

Rob: It will be fine. I'll put extra ballast (on top of the two bags the sandman aka Gary had already bought that morning) up in the front and set the trim where it needs to be.

Ray: (to me) I don't think this is a good idea, but your brother always wants to disagree.

So they decide to race. Meanwhile Mom, Sean and I head to 15th street where we watch the race. It is one of the best races we've seen. We can identify Not Guilty without binoculars (barely) and they are passing other boats..... and getting passed.... and then passing again on the inside of the curve. It's an actual race with 7 boats in their class. One boat in their class is way out ahead but the one boat that usually wins slows down on lap 5. We know this is good news. After the final lap we head to the inlet.

For the next several hours we wonder if our boat 'broke out' or if by some chance R2 miscounted the number of laps and didn't finish where they thought they did. It turns out that the first lap which was supposed to be the parade lap was actually part of the race and they (along with many others) ran an extra lap. We go to the party and eat lots of great food. Then we nervously await the results.

Class 6 goes first... 3rd place: The 611 boat! We cheer because this means, Team Not Guilty will be taking home the Silver Medal and a large trophy, that looks more like a plant stand, and a nice check!

We were very excited that the ballast in the boat paid off!

Snore and Roar

Upon moving back to DC, I learned about Snore and Roar. Last year Sean and I became FONZ (Friends of the National Zoo) members so we could register for Snore & Roar, a camp-out at the zoo that would give us an opportunity to get backstage of one of the offered exhibits. Last year we registered for the Primate House, however it was rained out. We joined again in 2007, so we could go to Snore and Roar. Friday after work we headed to the zoo to begin our Snore & Roar Adventure. Let me tell you this: We were super excited. We had paid extra for the Great Cats tour. Although extra, we knew that this was the way to go, and passed on the Small Mammal house, the Reptile House, the Birds, and some of the other less exciting options. We arrived right on time and began assembling our tent under a big beautiful tree on the flattest ground we could find. We then watched the fathers show up with their daughters. The Mothers with their sons. The lady with her daughter and the daughter's boyfriend. (this was just strange, and they all looked miserable.)

Sean and I chuckled that we were the only childless people there and started coming up with ideas on how we could scare the children at night. (Don't worry, no children were harmed or scared!)

After approximately 11 tents were erected, for three Snore and Roar programs (Great Cats, Cheetahs and Pandas), we broke into our group of 10 and went back to where the tigers and lions are kept. Sean and I were totally excited at this point and pushed our way to the front. We had to stand behind a yellow line which was about 3 feet from the cages. Some of the cats just stared at us, some paced back and forth, others jumped on the cage wanting to play or eat us. Last year, 3 Sumatran Tiger cubs were born and we went to the zoo for their debut. Now they are close to 150 pounds and were a blast to watch. The lions weren't as exciting although the young male was very excited to see us and paced back and forth in clumsy fashion.



The Lioness is mostly relaxed.
One of the tiger cubs eagerly looks at the tourists. The most fun was playing with the cubs. I would look at one and then start walking down the hallway, looking over my shoulder and it would follow me to the end of the enclosure, which meant it might have to go through a couple of cat doors that they were allowed to pass through. I was more entertained than the cub.

Now I have mixed feelings about the whole zoo concept, but it was definitely a wonderful experience to get that close to these beautiful animals. After about an hour we got to feed two animals which have strange and forgettable names. One looked like a small anteater and the other like a large rat. This wasn't exciting in the least, but it stalled for time while the other group went into the cat house.

After the exhibit tour we went on a flashlight tour. We only saw a few duck families, a sleeping Red Panda, squawking flamingos and the alligator. Oh, and huge cranes.

Upon returning to our tent, we got ready for bed and listened to the kids settle down. It did thunder during the night, but luckily no one evacuated us, and no children started screaming as I feared there would be an uproar. Around 5am, I heard a noise which I cannot replicate in words, nor can I mock with my voice. I can only guess it was some sort of bird and probably one of those very large cranes we spotted the night before. Well, the cranes had a lot to say and it was no surprise that everyone was up and tents were down before 7am.

By 8am we were home, wishing we could have slept near the cats instead of the kids and birds. I would have like to cozy up with this guy...

This lion finally calmed down for a few minutes to sit and smile for me.